10 Parenting Mistakes You Should Avoid

Photo Courtesy:    PublicDomainPictures

Photo Courtesy: PublicDomainPictures

As parents, you are likely to make some errors, knowingly or unknowingly. What is important is that you consciously look at these mistakes and take steps to avoid/rectify them. Enlisted here are some of the parenting mistakes that you must avoid.

1. Having unrealistic expectations

Just because you were an all-rounder or an over-achiever as a kid, does not mean that you should expect your child to be one. Expecting your kid to excel at everything or do extremely well in fields that you are good at is unfair. Each child is different and has a different skill set. You shouldn’t have unrealistic expectations as it will prove harmful for the child’s growth.

2. Being over-critical

You might feel that being critical of your child will motivate him or her to improve but persistent criticism might backfire and make the child give up or retaliate. You must appreciate your kid whenever he or she does something good. If you keep the praises in your heart and only talk about what your child is lacking, then it could prove extremely detrimental. Your child will grow up believing that he or she is constantly falling short of expectations and can never be good enough.

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3. Being over-protective

As parents, you might feel very protective of your child but remember that excess of everything is bad. If you are over-protective, then your child will never feel prepared enough to face the world alone. It is important to sometimes to let your child learn from his or her own mistakes. No matter how hard you try, you cannot always shield your kids from every possible harm.

4. Lacking at communication

The root of most misunderstandings between parents and kids is a lack of communication. Take some time out to talk to your child, even if it is something completely random and seemingly unimportant. Make sure that you listen to your child intently and observe his/her gestures. This will help you in being aware of what is troubling the child and you will also be able to alert him/her about any possible danger.

5. Constantly comparing the kids

If you keep comparing your child with other kids, then it is bound to have some lasting negative effects. As the child grows up, he/she will be constantly aim at bringing down others in order to outshine them. This will also make him/her feel jealous and angry towards other kids. You must let the child know that your love is unconditional and that each kid has and should be appreciated for his/her own unique personality.

6. Not spending enough time with kids

Remember that there is no substitute for the time that you personally spend with your kids. No amount of toys, games, or money can ever fill that void. When you spend time with your kids during their formative years, it ensures a strong foundation for a healthy relationship. Regardless of how busy your routine might be, set aside some time for your children and give them your undivided attention.

7. Not keeping your promises

Your behavior affects your kids as they see you as an example of how one should be as an adult. If you fail to keep your promises or your commitments then your kids will never understand the value of keeping one’s word. They would eventually start losing their trust in you and will suffer from trust-issues for the rest of their lives. Ensure that you make realistic promises and are able to keep them.

8. Fighting in front of the children

As parents if you fight with each other, especially when your kids are young, it will make them lose faith in the institution of marriage. Since kids are very impressionable in their formative years, your words and your acts will leave an indelible mark on them. Avoid using foul language or having arguments in front of them.

9. Being over-possessive

You are bound to be a bit possessive about your kids as parents. But keep in mind that when you become over-possessive, you are preparing a ground for future crisis. You must learn to let go and understand that your kids are going to start their own life as they grow older. If you do not let them move away from your shadow, they will never be able to find their true self.

10. Failing to say sorry

You often teach your kids the importance of accepting one’s mistake and saying sorry. However, as parents, many people usually do not practice what they preach. Remember that kids learn by observing your behavior. It is vital to say sorry if you happen to make a wrong judgment or a mistake. It will show them that you are humble and strong enough to take responsibility for your actions and they will eventually follow suit. Do not make them believe that forgiving someone is a privilege that only adults can enjoy. This will go a long way in building their character.

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